So this news entry is twice ridiculous.

Apparently some guy and his wife are going through a divorce, and he wanted to talk to her. Now, I don’t know whether or not he was just trying to be a reasonable guy and she was being stubbornly unreceptive…maybe he’d been trying to contact her for a while…maybe her phone was broken. Maybe his message was really important.

Or, maybe he’d been badgering her and she had had enough. Either way, he wanted to talk, and she wanted to stay shut up in her house.

So he knocks on the window.

Now, I put this forward, readers: when someone you wish to talk to ignores your knocks on the window, what is the next logical step for you?

Try the door?
Call her?
Stick your boot in the door?
Give up and go home?

This man had a different idea: he decided the only reasonable thing to do would be to douse the area around the house in gasoline and light it on fire. Because naturally, her house being on fire would force her out so that they could talk! It’s all about the talk, people!

Well, the fire burned out without doing enough damage to force her out. It did do enough, however, to get the attention of the authorities. Needless to say, the fellow is under arrest for arson.

The second punchline? Look at that article!

“But the fire burned itself out, causing only minor damage to the area around the home. And Pippin fled the scene.

The woman later told police she was going through a divorce. And Pippin was arrest on arson charges.”

It’s almost like some kind of poetry. Terrible, terrible poetry. The woman later told the police she was going through the divorce.

And Pippin was arrest on arson charges.

They couldn’t put that more gracefully? I mean…somebody got paid for writing that!

Stay in school kids. Or not. Doesn’t seem to matter.

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Filed under: Action, Comedy, Remakes and Sequels, Images

Seriously, is there anyone else around today other than Steve Carell who could walk around with a shoe to their head, holding it like a phone, and look both utterly ridiculous and staunchly professional at the same time? Part of me is happy to see great, funny pictures and trailers (the phone booth) for Get Smart popping up, but part of me worries that it’s skyrocketing my expectations. That’s the problem with movie marketing — if it’s too crappy, people will chastise it and ignore the film. But if it’s too good, it better live up to expectations.

Anyhow, I’ll keep hoping. The above picture comes from Empire, and is the best of the pair, with Maxwell Smart talking to his shoe. However, the other picture isn’t bad either — it’s got Smart and Agent 99 running down the street — she’s looking like your normal, distressed runner, but once again, Carell pulls off that look of utter seriousness, and I can’t help but wonder how difficult it was to run so very stiffly.

Unfortunately, the pay-off for these images is still months away. The film opens on June 20, 2008.

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Filed under: Action, Foreign Language, Independent, Quentin Tarantino, Retro Cinema

It’s a pity, but it’s probably mandatory for modern film fans to know a little history before watching King Boxer (better known in the US as 5 Fingers of Death) for the first time. Otherwise, you might watch it and think: “Fun little movie with great kick-butt action, but what’s all the fuss about? Why do some people think this particular kung fu movie is so great?”

Bruce Lee had given US television viewers a taste of martial arts in his sidekick role as Kato in The Green Hornet (1966-1967) and David Carradine further whetted appetites with the TV show Kung Fu, which debuted in February 1972. Of course, Hong Kong had already produced dozens of martial arts films, many of which played on the Chinatown movie theater circuit in the US, but even for a seasoned viewer, Korean director Chang-Hwa Jeong (AKA Chang Chang Ho) worked several new twists into the familiar fabric. For moviegoers in general, King Boxer was a sucker punch to the gut, featuring fighting styles never before seen on screen, surprising in its extreme violence, and filled to the brim with socko brutality and in-your-face action. No wonder its theatrical release kick-started the kung fu craze in America.

I was a big fan of Kung Fu, but there was no way my parents would ever let me see an R-rated movie in the spring of 1973, much less one that was already fabled for its bloody violence. So I sulked and listened jealously while school friends raved about how “cool” the movie was — especially when the guy got his eyeballs gouged out! More than 30 years later, the violence has long been surpassed, which allows the strength of the storytelling, characterizations, and action choreography to come to the fore.

Continue reading Retro Cinema: King Boxer (AKA 5 Fingers of Death)

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Filed under: Action, Fandom, DIY/Filmmaking, Remakes and Sequels

Cinematical was lucky enough to visit the set of Ghost Town earlier today, where we spoke exclusively with writer-director David Koepp about this new film, as well as how it was writing what will probably go down as the biggest film of 2008: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. We’ll have a full set report on Ghost Town a little down the line as its late summer (tentative) release date approaches, but in the meantime, we wanted to find out a couple things from Koepp (who was the nicest guy, by the way) on Indy 4. Primarily, has he seen any of the finished product yet? Says Koepp, “Well I saw Indy’s death scene, which was very moving. Um, I probably shouldn’t have said that.” We both laugh, since Koepp was obviously joking. He was joking, right? “I saw little bits here and there, and at first I felt a lot of pressure [writing the script] because you don’t want to be the one who screws up a beloved franchise. But there’s nothing you can do except work extra hard — so I worked extra hard. You can’t approach it except as you would any other movie.”

One of the things that’s been talked about for some time now is whether Frank Darabont’s old Indiana Jones 4 script was used while Koepp was writing the new script. Darabont’s been pretty outspoken about the whole thing recently, admitting that he hasn’t seen the final product, but has heard that elements of his script were used. We asked Koepp about this — whether he used Darabont’s script as a reference — and he had this to say: “I looked at everything that everyone had written. It’s been in development since the early ’90s; anything that was any good, I tried to use — sometimes it stayed, sometimes it didn’t. We’re all assistant storytellers; there was a ton of material there already. Part of my job was shaper, and part of my job was coming up with new stuff.”

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull arrives in theaters on May 22, 2008.

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Filed under: Cellphones, Home Entertainment, Portable Audio, Portable Video

We’re not certain why anyone treats the inevitable arrival of a second-gen iPhone sometime next year as earth-shattering news, but Goldman Sachs released a note to clients yesterday saying that the rumored 3G version is in its “final design phase.” The investment firm’s David Bailey says he got the info from the usual assortment of moderately-reliable Asian component suppliers, and that he expects the new model to have “similar form factor” with a “different look.” Rounding out his list of obvious predictions, Bailey also said the existing model will get a capacity bump sometime next year as well, which makes sense given the proliferation of 32GB flash devices we’ve seen pop up lately. Somewhat more interestingly, Bailey also said that Apple is planning on retooling the Apple TV next year, and that his sources the new version may pack an LCD screen. Sadly, Bailey didn’t have much to say about that rumored subnotebook, only that he’s heard of possible “design issues.” That doesn’t sound too promising — but we’re certain Steve will fill us in next month.

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Office Depot Featured Gadget: Xbox 360 Platinum System Packs the power to bring games to life!

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Filed under: Business

Your PS3 can do a lot of things. You know that, but does the average consumer know that? Sony Europe is displaying a new ad in retail stores in order to better illustrate the value of the PS3. They break down various components, such as the PS3’s ability to play MP3s, DVDs, Blu-ray movies, and more. Interestingly, they come to the conclusion that if everything a PS3 can do was purchased separately, it would cost a whopping £614.98. When you look at the £299 price tag the PS3 currently carries, it certainly seems like a deal, doesn’t it?

We think this is an effective way of representing the PS3’s versatile capabilities. However, does it come off as a bit snobbish? Do you think this ad will be effective in convincing consumers to get a PS3?

[Via Digg]

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Eva Mendes was supposed to wear prosthetic breasts in the comedy ‘Stuck On You’. However, after the directors saw her topless, they re-wrote the script.

She went on to say, “Boobs are really good. I love every aspect of being a woman. I believe you should celebrate who you are.”

Yes, boobs are good.

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Britney Spears’ habit of making the news in 2007 has helped her top the list of the ten most popular searches on internet search engine Yahoo!

The 26-year-old, who is currently embroiled in a custody battle with ex-husband Kevin Federline, has fascinated the world with her erratic behaviour this year, including shaving her head; attacking a paparazzo’s car with an umbrella; spending time in rehab; and leaving the industry world gobsmacked after a terrible performance of her last single at a recent award ceremony.

And while she might not be hitting the headlines for the right reasons, Britney’s life continues to attract attention, leading to today’s announcement that she has topped the Yahoo! search list for the sixth time in seven years.

“People do not know what to expect from her any more and the searches would spike every time she was back in the news,” said Vera Chan, senior editor at Yahoo!

“From when she shaved her head and rumours emerged from the rehab mill that she was calling herself the anti-Christ and shaved 666 on her scalp, there was constant tracking of this almost modern-day Greek tragedy happening in front of us.”

Britney’s former friend Paris Hilton was the only other person to top the list, in 2004, and was the third most popular search term this year, Chan confirmed.

“The tolerance for her party behaviour was fading, but her jail sentence popped her back up to that level of attention,” she added.

Lindsay Lohan’s arrest for driving under the influence saw her climb from tenth to sixth, while better behaved celebrities Beyonce Knowles and Jessica Alba finished in fifth and tenth respectively.

The top ten most popular Yahoo searches in 2007 were:

1. Britney Spears
2. WWE
3. Paris Hilton
4. Naruto
5. Beyonce Knowles
6. Lindsay Lohan
7. RuneScape
8. Fantasy Football
9. Fergie
10. Jessica Alba

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They claim there is a scientific purpose for their experiments, but to be honest with you, we can’t quite figure out what that purpose may be. The South Korean scientists who created this pair of fluorescent felines claim that this breakthrough will help them study diseases and stem cells. We might not be biologists, but we’re not really sure what the connection between AIDS and a cat that looks like a jack-o-lantern is.

This is far from the first time scientists have cloned animals and genetically altered them to glow unearthly colors. Mice, rabbits, pigs — nothing is safe. A company even bred genetically altered fluorescent fish to sell as pets, called GloFish. Check out our gallery of other flourescent animals below.

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From The Daily Mail

Related links:

• High School Sophomore Discovers Dinosaur Mummy
• New Super Mice Run for 5 Hours Without Stopping
• 10 Most Bizarre Science Experiments

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ZVUE’s ZP3 digital audio player does not let you go home empty-handed - it is pre-loaded with 30 of this year’s top hits, and has been made available in more than 3,400 Wal-Mart stores and other retailers throughout the US. Unfortunately, the ZP3 MP3 player has a paltry 512MB of internal memory - looks like there are no improvements in terms of hardware one year after its launch. 512MB of space roughly translates to 125 songs in MP3 format. The ZVUE ZP3 supports DRM WMA music files, the MTP (media transport protocol) standard, and Windows Media Player 10. A single AAA battery is capable of powering the ZVUE for up to 8 hours. Audio is transferred between the computer to the ZVUE ZP3 via a USB connection. 30 top hits of the year eh, sounds like a bag of mixed surprises to me. If you’re into something a little bit more updated, why not check out the ZVUE 260 portable media player?

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